Not You Becoming a Pleasure Guru
Five Party Games and Two Gifts for Undoing Existential Constraints
It’s December and you know what that means: bringing your social game to the various soirees that dot your landscape.
Whether you’re heading to the Zoom room with your most festive holiday sweater / Hanukkah bib strapped on or actually putting on your face and going to a Real Place, ’tis the season to stir the pot, is it not?
I brag a lot of fun n spicy ingredients in my Chex party mix, but I also have an awkward side that sometimes gets shy when I navigate a lot of new interactions at once. I’m not a big drinker, so I seek out other forms of social lubricant that allow me to get wild. As a result, party games have become one of my favorite energies to cultivate. Many of the reasons I dabble in connection games and social experiments is because I like to roll with a spade up my sleeve; a way to zhush a situation so that it blooms and opens in mysterious, sparkly ways.
And for those who have never not sparkled when thrown into a crowd of thirsty strangers, consider the following suggestions some intriguing fuel for your escapades. But don’t take my word for it — the real goal is to let these games take YOU somewhere new.
If you don’t want to become a fun pleasure guru, UNSUBSCRIBE NOW.
Pleasure Guru 101
One of my dearest friends and I were texting the other week about hilarious tests that were happening for us in our personal lives. Instead of letting myself feel butthurt about things I can’t control, I’m learning to laugh instead. Because when that happens, the joke appears, and it becomes easier to access the hidden lesson.
This game works best if you’re willing to expose yourself and go all the way. It is a powerful one to play with people you want to know better and are willing to reveal some telling intel in good confidence.
Someone must volunteer to hop in the hot seat first. This person will share a recurring situation or pattern that they feel stuck in and desire to shift. Examples might look like:
I’m so tired of my friends taking advantage of my generosity.
I feel shy in new situations and don’t know how to get past that.
I always have to be right otherwise I feel attacked.
I want to experience <a certain kind of situation> differently.
Then the guinea pig must surrender completely to the group, who will morph collectively into the most pleasurable guru that has ever oozed through a room. The end goal? Arrive at a highly playful if not borderline absurd spiritual quest for the guinea pig to consider as an unexpected antidote to their fear / problem.
For instance, my friend gives really good advice, but occasionally his honesty can feel like a lot. (And more importantly, sometimes we don’t want to be fixed.) My exact quest for him:
Whereas his quest for me was that I dedicate myself to arranging the humble produce aisle at my local grocery store.
In other words: what creative friction can you generate to slide into the situation sideways? How can you support this person in seeing with infinite eyes?
Be the Blessing
Let’s imagine that everyone in the room has a sacred, special task that only they can perform over the course of this one evening. Without it, the night won’t reach peak vibe. You must impart the essential nature of this initiative and request that everyone identify their sacred task before entering the scene and play it out fully. For example, you might determine that your unique sacred task is to…
…offer each person a unique blessing.
…start an inclusive dance off.
…learn an essential life lesson from everyone you speak to.
…deeply embody gratitude.
…make sure that no one stands alone for more than 5 minutes.
…take creative risks with your conversation.
What happens as a result of your sacred assignment?
Got It!
I love this one because it’s a fun way to attune energies and get a peek into the subconscious shared frequencies in the room. The whole point is to get aligned with others around you and the deeper you go the more real it gets. Apparently it’s a trend on TikTok, but in my opinion it’s way more fun IRL. When played with a good mix of friends and new people, the game yields bizarre synchronicities and delightful connections that illuminate shared resonance.
Why Are We Here?
You, and a room full of strangers. What *could* happen next? Well, my friends, that’s up to YOU.
More than discovering what you all might have in common, decide that you will arrive at a new place together. Keep going until you get there — wherever you collectively believe that is, and don’t be afraid to get weird.
Does someone need a healing? Are you all here to invent something that doesn’t exist yet? Could it be that each one of your bodies was a piece of a clever sigil? Will you improvise a singular dance prayer?
Why are you here — tonight, together — and what is the unique nature of the portal your collective presence co-creates?
Mission Inception
Tonight, play life like it’s a scavenger hunt. Your mission? Plant a miracle.
The best way to engage this game is to name a series of ingredients that you’d like to see unfold within a specific timespan. Think of these things as the seeds. Define the seeds enough that you will be able to identify it when the thing in question crosses your path, but open enough to allow the universe some agency and opportunity. And throw in some curve balls to really test the flexibility of the supreme consciousness, why not.
For instance: inspirational motto in an unexpected place, secret lounge with arcade games, bad dad joke, alien takeover, horny nun, one bro talking about his bucket list.
No matter what you seed for your miracle evening, everyone you are with must be in on the game. The point is to hold these ingredients deeply yet loosely in your mind as you take your collective inception out into the mystery. Believe in your inception enough, and it will happen. Take notes. Don’t come home until you’re done.
Two Gifts for You
Now that we are in the throes of the holidays, this newsletter wouldn’t be complete without a few gifts tucked inside. Here are some offers and opportunities to consider this December.
- Gift your loved ones a spiritual healing. As an initiated diviner, one of my favorite things to do is support people in transforming their life and connecting with their ancestors and spirit guides. If you want to give the gift that keeps on giving, give your peeps some deep healing. From now until the end of December, 90 min virtual divinations with me are only 125 USD. Contact me via my website to get yours.
- My book, The Art of the Experiment, is a great stocking stuffer. This potent and playful manual is for anyone who wants to change their life but doesn’t know where to start. Chock full of fun transformational experiments, perspective shifts, and ridiculous mantras that will get you thinking and acting outside the box. Buy on Amazon.
May many blessings find you this season, my friends! Until next time.
🔺
Katharine Hargreaves is a spiritual mentor, transformational facilitator, ceremonial guide, and initiated medicine womxn. Her first book, The Art of the Experiment, is a transformational manual for people who want to change their life but don’t know where to start. For more information on Katharine and how to work with her, visit her website.
